Harry Potter: It's not goodbye, it's just see you later

Oh you guys. This was some readalong, huh? We had some laughs, and then some cries, and then some more laughs and crys and it was kind of the best thing that a group of people on the internet have ever done ever?

FIRSTLY before I even try to sum up anything Harry Potterish, I have to say THE HUGEST thank you to Alice for being our gracious and also excellent host these past SIX MONTHS (seriously guys, that is the longest time).

Every single week I've felt bad when everyone else is a better thanker than me, but look! An actual Harry Potter gif from an actual Harry Potter film (don't ask me which one because I don't bloody know, do I?) But anyway, yes, Alice you've been great, and THANK YOU especially for getting your post up really early for those of us in foreign lands and strange time zones, even if we sometimes have to be reminded to link up our posts. Ahem.

And now, Harry Potter. I didn't want to talk about the Epilogue last week because I didn't want to end my post on a bummer, but I'm just going to have a teeny moan about it now. Because... Ok, I never used to HATE the epilogue at all, but it feels like for the entire readalong, everyone's been saying 'UGH, the epilogue' and I read it this time, and... Yeah. It's not even that I hate the pairs that JK makes, especially (although I do hate that Ginny didn't get to name ANY of her kids) although you have all made me want either a Harry-Luna or Harry-Draco union SOMEHOW, but that's not the problem.

The problem is, I want to know what happens to EVERYONE- how has George even coped with life after Fred's death? It's so amazing that Neville is a Professor, but what about his personal life? Is he married to Luna, and for that matter, hey, WHERE IS LUNA? It seems like JK makes her a pretty important character, especially in the Deathly Hallows, and then just leaves her out completely. And then, just, everyone else. I want to know far far more than there's space for in the Epilogue, and if I can't have it all then I'd rather just have nothing, and I'll imagine what's happened to all the characters myself, THANK you very much.

But. Let's just put that aside now, because I'm over it and oh my gosh have I even mentioned how much I love Harry Potter? I can't think of another thing I would spend six months of my life on, and the weirdest thing is, I'm still not at all done with it. I know that my posts every week were INSANELY long (um... Sorry about that) but honestly they could probably have been twice as long and I would still have things to say. And I don't even know why that it but it probably has something to do with the fact that, even though there's a finite number of pages in the series, they have created an infinite world inside each of our brains, all of them different, which makes an infinite number of infinite worlds and yeah. Woah.

So basically, JK Rowling is an amazing human being and I know that I'm grateful she went on that train journey that one day and dreamed up Harry Potter because I can't even imagine a world without it in. And we're so lucky because we grew up WITH Harry, but imagine what it's going to be like for all the generations of kids to come who get to grow up in a world where Harry Potter already exists- Guys- if we have kids (not together. Unless you want to) WE GET TO READ HARRY POTTER TO THEM. We have the opportunity to bring children that joy, and that is just the coolest thing ever in the world ever.

So. To sum up. This was the best readalong ever and I'll probably never read Harry Potter in quite the same way in my life again ever, and I love you all for your comments and your posts and for making everything about this experience The Best.

I am mostly VERY SAD that the readalong is over, but there's a teeny part of my brain (the crazy part that wants to read things that aren't Harry Potter) that's already noticed that I'm doing better at reading other things now that there's not a kind of huge part thinking about Harry Potter all the time. But still, I wouldn't have traded this for anything. This. Was. Awesome.

"'Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean it is not real?'"

Oh my gosh, you guys. I can't even begin to process the fact that THERE IS NO MORE HARRY POTTER TO READ, and also THIS IS BASICALLY THE LAST HARRY POTTER DAY, and other sad things like that, so INSTEAD let's just talk about the book and weep.

There is SO MUCH to talk about in this last section, I think (I have, like, 18 pages of notes, mostly because I'm INSANE but also because I copied out whole CHUNKS of text, but anyway) and I'm going to try and restrain myself and only say the very most important things, mostly because I have a time limit (places to go etc etc) but also because, what is there to say? This section is both wonderful and horrible at the same time, and pretty much all of it makes me want to weep but let's just talk about the things that actually did, shall we?

• Percy comes back!- I don't even remember if I was expecting this to happen, or if it was just a wonderful surprise, but every time it gets me because OMG all Molly wants is for all her children to be together and he comes back and ADMITS HE WAS WRONG and it's lovely. 

• BUT THEN- Fred dies- And how cruel is that, JK? Firstly it always gets me when ONE twin is killed off because THEY ARE TWINS AND ARE SUPPOSED TO BE TOGETHER ALWAYS, but this is Fred! We know Fred! We love him! And also it feels like Ron might be dead for a minute and that is terrifying, but then Fred is ACTUALLY dead and it's not a relief! Nothing about this is good!

• And then Lupin and Tonks- This is a cruel and horrible thing to do to her readers, but it sure is moving (and awful)- Not only do they now have an orphaned child, Harry's just lost the last living (close) link to his parents and also remember how much I fancied Lupin in PoA? It was a LOT.

• Snape.- I am physically unable to cope with how much Snape loved Lily, and for how long, and how he really was protecting Harry for all those years and oh, Snape. I was of course weeping throughout all of his memories, but I also just think... How amazing that this one chapter can change your entire view of a character because seriously? I hated Snape so much. HATED him. Was absolutely willing to be convinced that he was evil because I hated him, but then, new information emerged and suddenly everything I thought about him was turned into this deep sympathy for him and that is why I've been defending him for this whoooole readalong. Oh Snape. You deserved better than being eaten by a snake.

• Then Harry accepts that he's going to have to die- And I know! I know he isn't going to die! But still it's terrifying being inside his brain when HE thinks he's going to have to die, and it's so beautiful that he doesn't even question the reality of this- not that he's not scared but that he's brave enough not to run away from death because he believes it's the thing to do to save everyone he cares about. God, I love him.

• The Resurrection Stone- I LITERALLY CANNOT DEAL WITH THIS BIT. All the crying. All of it. Ever. "'You'll stay with me?' 'Until the very end,' said James. 'They won't be able to see you?' asked Harry. 'We are part of you' said Sirius. 'Invisible to anyone else.' Harry looked at his mother. 'Stay close to me,' he said quietly." (I'm not kidding, I am crying right now from typing that. DESTROYS me.)

• The Headmasters' Office- I'm pretty much ok once Harry doesn't die (although I am still a bit sniffly when he meets Dumbledore in Purgatory or wherever) and then Voldy dies and whathaveyou and Harry, Ron and Hermoine go up to Dumbledore's office and the portraits all give him a standing ovation? And in Dumbledore's portrait "tears were sliding down from behind the half-moon spectacles into the long silver beard, and the pride and gratitude emanating from him filled Harry with the same balm as phoenix song"? Yeah, that gets to me. Right in the heart.

So what can I say? There was a lot of crying. And also, a few other things:

• It's so perfect that the last quarter of the book happens in Hogwarts. It's kind of one of those things where I didn't realise how much I missed it until we got back there, and even with all these bad things going on, it's still so. good. to be back there even under so much trauma. "But he was home. Hogwarts was the first and best home he had ever known." Perfect.
• I know we've been doing the whole Draco-Harry thing (Harry saved his life! TWICE!) But what about Luna and Harry? She's there with Dean and Ernie and their Patronuses, urging Harry to think of happy things, and she's there when it's all over, knowing just what Harry needs. Or... Maybe I just want to marry Luna?
• Ok, so what is that gross thing in the bundle at Kings Cross/Purgatory? Is it the part of Voldemort's soul that was attached to Harry, or... Something else? And in other questions I want answered, does anyone really care about the Deathly Hallows at this point? Are they really just there to make the point that we shouldn't be afraid of death? Cause that's cool.
• Neville is a fucking badass. Also, fun snake fact- Nagini is a sanskrit word for an deity that takes the form of a snake, so REALLY we should have known she was holding a bit of Voldy from day 1 (or book 4. Whenever she appears.)
• "'NOT MY DAUGHTER YOU BITCH.'" Best thing ever. 
• In the end, Voldy is killed by his own rebounding curse. I feel like it's a very superhero-ish thing for Harry never to have to kill anyone, and in the end for evil to end up being it's own foil, and then at the same time, I'm not sure if I feel like it's a bit of a cop-out? I could go either way on this, folks.

AND I'M DONE! As is Harry Potter. WHAT AM I GOING TO DO NOW? 

"'Some wizards just like to boast that theirs are bigger and better than other people's.'"

What is there even to say about this part of Harry Potter? I mean, a lot, obviously, but who can care about OTHER things when DOBBYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!

But, I mean, when did Dobby even become a character I would cry over? Remember back in the innocent days of the Chamber of Secrets when we were all like 'UGH DOBBY'? Now I just feel bad for ever feeling that way about a hero amongst elves, and I really love the way Harry reacts to his death- a mixture of gratitude and deep pain at another friend he's lost along the way. Digging the grave with his bare hands? Way to make me cry, JK.

(No, but seriously, Dobby is STILL annoying in CoS. I stand by that.)

Oooh, and here's a thing. I think that a really nice touch in this book is the way that saying 'Voldemort' has become a taboo that has actual consequences. Like, before it was just taboo to say, as if saying it was going to bring him back, or meant he was going to listen to you or something, and people just didn't like saying or hearing it. And Dumbledore worked tirelessly to try and make sure that Harry, at least, wasn't scared of a word, and made him feel like saying it gave him extra strength. But then in this book, all of that flips and it becomes LITERALLY dangerous to say it. And I don't know if that's some kind of nod to Dumbledore's foolishness, or if it's just a kind of nifty thing to have done, but DAMN I like it.

Now, before the bullet points, a moment of silence for this week's death list:

Death Count: Too many for an actual number: Ted Tonks, Dirk Cresswell, Gornuk the goblin, a family of five unnamed muggles, DOBBY, an unspecified number of Death Eaters, probably countless others.

Death Count Overall: Who can even say?

• I completely forgot that Ron DIDN'T go back to The Burrow in his... hiatus, but I appreciate the implication that the Weasleys (with the probable exception of Molly) wouldn't exactly have welcomed him with open arms. Damn, they're awesome.
• I definitely mentioned this in my post on Beedle the Bard, but I STILL think it's awesome that the three of them each pick a different Hallow as the best, and it's totally indicative of their characters- Ron wants something that will make him better than someone, Harry wants something to give him back the people he's lost, and Hermione wants something to keep them all safe. It's just... Yes.
• But ALSO this time I noticed that in the story of the Three Brothers, it says that the second brother (i.e. Harry's choice) was the most arrogant, and isn't that INTERESTING? Considering that Snape (AUGH, Snape. Sorry, had a flashforward.) has always said that Harry's all arrogant and all? Interesting indeed.
• Are we going to talk about how Harry has Draco's 'wand' now? And about how it works really well for him and sparks come out of the end and stuff? Because... I think that's something we need to be talking about! And did we also see Draco refusing to confirm Harry et al's identities? I know I've been the most reluctant about this Draco-Harry thing, but... Wow. Just, wow.
• I hate Bellatrix so much. YOU CAN'T JUST TORTURE HERMIONE AND KILL DOBBY WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!

Also, I have issues with the bit where Hermione says using Bellatrix's wand feels all gross, and Harry has to restrain himself from saying that the wand is only as good as it's master. Because, how about THAT WAND JUST FUCKING TORTURED HERMIONE YOU IDIOT. God, he's insensitive.

• "Ron said 'Blimey, a baby!' as if he had never heard of such a thing before." Oh Ron. You moron.
• Remember how much I liked the whole SITUATIONESS of the situation in the Ministry? How awesome is the one in Gringotts?! I really just have to take my hat off to JK for these actiony scenes of awesomeness. Really.
• Aberforth has a goat Patronus.

• NEVILLE! Neville has made his first appearance of the book, so obviously everything is going to be fine now! (Shhh, don't tell me anything else.)

So yeah. That's 3/4 of the Deathly Hallows done, then. In a way it feels like loads has happened, but in another way, it feels like NONE OF THE IMPORTANT THINGS have happened. Which bodes really well for this coming week, except that it's the last week and after this I'm going to have to find a life or something and what am I going to doooooo?! 

"'Stuff like that always sounds cooler than it really was... I've been trying to tell you that for years.'"

My understanding about this readalong group (other than our innate awesomeness) is that everyone hates the bit where they go camping in the woods for almost no reason. I might be wrong about this (SOMEONE might like it) but that's the impression I get, AND SO I am going to defend the camping with all my arguing skills and also, hopefully, wit.

But first, I think it's important to talk about what happens in the Ministry because oh HELLO one of my favourite set-pieces in Harry Potter! I mean, what DON'T I love about it? There's the nostalgia element (puking pastilles from OotP, Polyjuice Potion from CoS), the flushing themselves into the Ministry (I laugh at the bits ten year olds laugh at, obviously) Harry being a big scary man, the getting one up on Umbridge (who of course- OF COURSE- had the locket. Because why wouldn't she?) and just the general excitement of it all. Scenes in the Ministry=Pretty much the best.

While we're on the subject of Umbridge, who I believe has made her final appearance now (?) and that's ok, I just... What is WRONG with that woman? I feel like her character type is almost the one that scares me the most, because all that motivates her, and all she wants, is power of any type, at any cost. She doesn't care who the ultimate authority is, as long as SHE'S in a position of power over a lot of people. She's basically like a Commandant of a Concentration Camp who, after all this is over, would say 'but I was just doing my job!' and probably believe it, too. I just... UGH. UGH.

ALSO before we get to the camping (sorry...) I just want to talk about Dumbles and Harry for a sec. Because, even though I'm still not sure what good finding out all this stuff about Dumbledore does Harry/us, I feel like Harry makes a really good point when he finds out that Dumbles lived in Godric's Hollow too. I mean... Why didn't Dumbledore ever tell Harry that? Couldn't he have arranged for them to go there and see the monument to his parents and just to heal, a little bit? I get that it would be difficult for Dumbledore to go there because of all the Bad Things, but... I feel like Harry needed that kind of thing, or at least that he needs it now as something to hold onto about Dumbles. Instead, it really does feel like he sort of just used Harry for his own gain (and that of the Wizarding World, obviously, but still) and never really did anything just for Harry.

I'm hoping other things are going to happen that I don't remember about Dumbledore, because I hate thinking this way about him.

So, the camping! I can't say that it's my absolute favourite part of all the books, and it makes me slightly grouchy when THEY are grouchy, but the thing is... I feel like, firstly, it was an inevitable consequence of all three of them being in close quarters without a set goal, because my GOD, people do get sick of each other quickly enough. And yeah, they've been together at school for years, but in that situation, there's routine, and there's enough food, and there are other people around so they don't get as sick of each other. And the not having enough food leading to arguing thing? TOTALLY happens. It's just like real life, people!

And then, of course, Ron leaves.

Ron leaves because he's the least prepared for such an expedition (one where he might have to deprive himself of a meal, say) and because, I don't know, JK likes him the least? But the thing is- I LIKE that Ron leaves, because when he's gone, things don't feel right at all- Harry and Hermione are both miserable, nothing improves, A SNAKE IS HIDING INSIDE A DEAD PERSON (seriously- ew) and when he came back I was really really ridiculously happy? Which is really the reason for all bad things happening in books, so that when the bad time is over, things seem kind of excellent.

It doesn't hurt that Ron's return involves saving Harry's life, destroying a Horcrux (just fyi, the thing the Horcrux says about Ron being the least loved because his mother wanted a daughter has stuck with me as a massive Thing That Is True, which I know it isn't- other than, I'd imagine, that Molly did just keep going until she had a girl. But anyway.) And THEN you also have the thing where you realised that Dumbles must have known all along that Ron would probably leave, and then regret it and want to go back, and THAT'S why he left him the Deluminator. (Or is it? I'm not being cryptic, I just honestly don't know. AS ALWAYS).

I don't really have any extra things to say in bullet points today, but I do just want to talk about this one thing that really annoyed me. Here: "[Harry] was staggered now to think of his own presumption in accepting his friends' offers to accompany him on this meandering, pointless journey." I see you all nodding at the meandering, pointless journey part (but what if the journey itself is the point? What then?!) but HOW MANY times did he tell them not to come? And how many times did they insist? Exactly! Stop blaming yourself all the damn time, Harry. Jesus.

Speaking of which... Death count time!
Death Count: 4- Gregorovitch, Bathilda Bagshot, Harry's wand (RIP), The Third Part of Voldy's Soul.
Death Count Overall: 8 (9 if you include George's ear. Which apparently we are.)

"'Even You-Know-Who can't split himself into seven.'"

Oh, Deathly Hallows. You are so much more intense than your predecessors already, and we're only 10 chapters in! There's not only more ACTION in this book already, but, and I think we've all been feeling this, MORE OF THE CRYING. I just... Harry keeps thinking of his parents, and Sirius, and that's upsetting enough, and then there are other things about stuff that happens later and I don't even remember most of what happens later, but I still find everything really really sad. I literally started crying a bit at 'I open at the close', and nothing has happened with that yet! Or will for ages!

I'm really just not emotionally prepared for this AT ALL.

I don't know if this is just me, but the Bit At The Burrow felt kind of different to me in this book. I think that, in all other cases, I'm pretty much like 'GET TO HOGWARTS ALREADY' (I'm sorry, I really like Hogwarts) but this time it felt very calming and safe, almost definitely because what's coming isn't the other familiarity of Hogwarts, but the great unknown of the outside world, which, as is made extra-clear by Mad Eye Moody's death (WHICH I FORGOT ABOUT) is very very dangerous now. I mean, even the Malfoys are scared of Voldemort at this point. That can't be good.

It's bullet point time, I think, but first I'm going to start doing a body count for each section of the book, just so as, you know, we can keep track of who's dead. JUST LIKE VOLDY PROBABLY DOES.

Death Count: 4- Charity Burbage, Hedwig (NOOOOO), Mad Eye Moody, Rufus Scrimgeour. (And, let's face it, probably others at the Ministry, too).

• Have we talked before about how Hitler and Voldemort are not exactly dissimilar? Cause how's this one- Voldy's all like 'ONLY THE PURE BLOOD ARE ANY GOOD' and the dude toootally has a muggle father. Hitler's all like 'BLONDE HAIR AND BLUE EYES ONLY' and I think we all know that's not what he looks like. Just... I don't know, guys, crazy murdering assholes are stupid.
• It's gross how much Bellatrix is like

with Voldemort. I just... NO BELLATRIX. You evil bitch.

• I definitely didn't remember all this Dumbledore history. Am I right in thinking that it's not strictly  relevant to the story, but it IS really interesting? Or it's the most relevant ever and I'm just bad at remembering? 
• Dudley! Has he redeemed himself for YEARS of bullying? He has not. But it's nice to think, as Harry and the Dursleys part ways forever, that at least one of them doesn't think he's the shittiest person ever to have lived. AND HE WANTS HARRY TO BE SAFE! Oh, it's just adorable, really.
• Harry is very very much back to his not-wanting-people-to-risk-their-lives-for-him ways (which is very similar to his saving-people thing). And yes, it's all adorable and noble, but it is just extremely tiring. Because the thing that he doesn't at all get is that their not so much risking their lives for HIM so much as for the one thing that can stop Voldy. And yes, that is his burden, but it's not AT ALL one that he has to carry alone, obviously.
• The Seven Potters is both EXCELLENT and ENTHRALLING and seriously, my heart was in my throat the whole time. And I have read it before! More than once! So so awesome.
• Accio Hagrid? Accio HAGRID?! Can you even do that? Because I LOVE IT. And, oh man, Hagrid shouting at Lupin to leave Harry alone when he gets all rough with him. I just... I love you, Hagrid.
• "The measures they had taken to protect their families made him realise, more than anything else could have done, that they really were going to come with him and that they knew exactly how dangerous that would be. He wanted to tell them what that meant to him, but he simply could not find words important enough."

Please. You're killing me.

• Oh Dumbledore. You and your unexplained bequests. Oh, Scrimgeour. You and your annoying Ministryness. 
• Ron had no idea who Luna was before OotP, but sure, let's invite the Lovegoods to Bill and Fleur's wedding! On the plus side... LUNA! We all need quality Luna time, I think.
• There are some GREAT wand jokes in this section. I mean, really. "'You'd be surprised, it's not all about wandwork, either.'" and also "'I had not realised I ever discussed my vand vith fans.'" See, JK knows how to bring the funny still!
• I want an evening bag like Hermione's. I need to carry a lot of stuff with me. And also, HOW CLEVER IS THAT?! I'm so glad Hermione's there to sort everything out.
• I like that Harry is all sickened by Draco's fear and horror. I realise what this means from a Drarry viewpoint, but my thought is- would Draco feel the same way if he somehow had visions of Harry being all mistreated by Voldy? Because my gut feeling is that, no, no he would not. Or at least he wouldn't have before he started feeling all scared. And this is why Harry's the hero. 

As always, there is LOADS more to say, but I feel like I've already made you read ENOUGH. Go about your LIVES again, people!

"The only surviving woodcut shows that he had an exceptionally luxuriant beard."

When I signed up to the Harry Potter readalong of true awesomeness, I was expecting the usual- awesome discussions, arguments about various characters (*COUGH* Sirius *SPLUTTER* Snape), and mutual agreement that Luna and Neville are The Best. I've definitely gotten all of this and more, but the one thing I wasn't expecting was to get EXTRA HARRY POTTER- apart from, you know, the viewpoints of many people, I thought I pretty much knew what was what in the Potter-verse.

BUT. Clearly, I missed a crucial part of it.

The Tales of Beedle the Bard! This book is actually way better than I was expecting it to be, possibly because I didn't even know about Dumbledore's notes (GUYS! Dumbledore's notes!!) after each story, but mostly, I fear, because I'm an idiot. But anyway- the problem has been rectified now, thanks to Alice, and we can all rest easy now knowing that I have read Beedle the Bard.

I don't have a clue how to go about this post, but I'm just gonna take each story and say things about it (ok, I'm mainly going to say things about Dumbledore's notes. Yeah.)

The Wizard and the Hopping Pot
BE NICE TO PEOPLE is the clear message of this story, but also, you know, SHARE your skills if you can use them to help others, ok?

It IS nice to be exposed to stories that wizard children are told that teach them to be nice to muggles though, because sometimes it feels like the whole wizarding world kind of hates us, and that's just not cool.
ALSO, that witch who rewrote the stories in a GROSS way? Love her. Or, more specifically, this: "Mrs Bloxam's tale has met the same response from generations of wizarding children: uncontrollable retching, followed by an immediate demand to have the book taken from them and mashed into pulp."

The Fountain of Fair Fortune
Ok, so this story was kind of like The Wizard of Oz? You know, that end bit where they get symbols of the things they wanted because they actually already HAD them? And also no magic was really involved anywhere? This story was like that, at least in my brain.

I don't know... All I really care about is That Story about the ill-fated Hogwarts pantomime (Seriously. SERIOUSLY. That was amazing.) and also the fact that Lucius Malfoy's vendetta against Dumbledore started when he tried to get a book banned? I mean, REALLY, now he's just scraping the very bottom of the evil barrel. DON'T BAN BOOKS, MALFOY.
Also: "This exchange marked the beginning of Mr Malfoy's long campaign to have me removed from my post as Headmaster of Hogwarts, and of mine to have him removed from his position as Lord Voldemort's favourite Death Eater." Shit, Dumbledore, I think I love you...

The Warlock's Hairy Heart
I seriously dug this story because it has the kind of gruesomeness that I'm never not going to want. (Talk about a stupid sentence. I clearly mean 'I like tales of gruesomeness.' Duh.) It also hits all the Dumbledore-loves-Love buttons and yes. I like.
I was also REALLY pleased with JKR's footnote re: Warlocks, because did we have a discussion where we didn't know the difference between a Wizard and a Warlock? Or did I just have that conversation with myself? Either way- a Warlock is basically just a Wizard who is extra awesome. Which, I think we'll all agree is a very good thing to know!

Babbity Rabbity and Her Cackling Stump
Now THIS is pretty much The Emperor's New Clothes, amiright? Or at least it is to begin with, and then it turns into a kind of 'Haaa, aren't muggles silly?' kind of story. Which, I'm sorry, but how is a witch turning into a rabbit more likely than her turning into a tree? Exactly.
The notes talk a little bit about wizard-death and things, but Alley and I have been discussing how the paintings work (as in, are they a little bit alive after they're dead? Or just a kind of imprint of the dead person? Or... Something else?) and even though they're brought up here, they're still not really fully explained, so that was slightly disappointing.
BUT- it was all ok, because Professor McGonagall is the current Headmistress (we must assume) of Hogwarts! And that is just awesome.

The Tale of the Three Brothers
This story obviously has the most direct relevance to Harry Potter, even if it does kind of start off like The Three Billy Goats Gruff. (Juuust had to link to that because, what if you don't have that story in America?!) But yeah- technically it's the most interesting of the book because of that, but in a way it was also the least interesting, because I pretty much knew the story anyway.
BUT- One of my favourite parts of all of Harry Potter, I think, is when Harry, Ron and Hermione are discussing the Deathly Hallows and talk about which of them they'd choose, and their answers are SO reflective of their characters that it's just excellent. I just...

And then, of course, Dumbledore's thoughts on the subject are veeeery interesting, especially the potential existence of the Hallows (!!!) and their various dangers, and also the fact that even he (the greatest Wizard, maybe EVER) would find it easiest to refuse the Invisibility Cloak of the three. I feel like there's some kind of lack of bravery associated with the Invisibility Cloak, perhaps, but actually I think it's probably the one I'd choose... And the Elder Wand would be my last choice, if anyone wants to know! (Really not interested in Power. Really really.)
Favourite Footnote: "No witch has ever claimed to own the Elder Wand. Make of that what you will."

Nice work, JK. Nice work.

So, The Tales of Beedle the Bard! I will never miss it out again when I read Harry Potter. Aaaand, now I can read the Deathly Hallows, right? RIGHT?! (How can we only have one book left? I will be bereft after this. BEREFT.)

"'I am not worried, Harry,' said Dumbledore... 'I am with you.'"

Well, that was devastating, amiright?

Even now, 8 years after the book came out, I still don't know how to process or deal with the fact that Dumbledore is dead. I just... I mean, I know exactly why JK did it (mainly because she spells it out in a faiiirly heavy-handed paragraph- "he could not let anybody else stand between him and Voldemort." etc etc.) and why she did it in the way she did (mainly, I'm going to assume, to make me believe once and for all that SNAPE IS EVIL. Because, believe it or not, I totally bought that. Until... You know.) but that doesn't mean I have to like it. What it actually means is that I have to WEEP, and then worry about Hagrid (Hagrid loves Dumbledore SO MUCH) and then feel even sadder because how are the good guys supposed to win without Dumbles? HOW CAN THEY?!

But, instead of wallowing in my misery, can we talk about some nifty narrative devices* that I liked a lot? FIRSTLY, I enjoy that Harry is all invisible and body-bound whilst Dumbledore and Malfoy are having their showdown, so that we get to see what's going on, but Harry doesn't have to be involved in any way. I realise this is important IN OTHER WAYS too, but purely narratively, I think it's great. AND, then I like how there is a massive amount of drama when Harry is chasing Snape and Malfoy, and it's very fast and confusing, but THEN you get all the other characters going through what else happened that same evening so you don't miss out on anything, and it's like they're piecing everything together while you are also trying to figure out what just happened. It's just... I like it, ok?

Now! The grand list of things I didn't even remember happened at all!

1. This little exchange that Hagrid overhears: "'Well- I jus' heard Snape sayin' Dumbledore took too much fer granted an' maybe he- Snape- didn' wan' ter do it anymore.'" I mean... You know what I'm saying here, right?! Right.
2. Voldemort totally cursed the DADA job! Everything makes sense now. 
3. Snape was the one who heard the prophecy and sent Voldemort after Harry's parents. NOW. This was the BIGGEST revelation for me, and also the one that causes me the most trouble, because how can Snape be SO mean to Harry all the time, when actually he is genuinely the cause of his parents' deaths? I mean... Seriously, Snape, think about what you're doing, yeah?
4. I absolutely forgot about poor Bill's beautiful face. And Fleur's actual, now proven, awesomeness. "'I am good looking for both of us, I theenk!'"

Seriously, for all these things, I was just like:

Absolutely no memory at all. It's a shame, really.

I am skipping the bullet points this week (I'm too sad. And also, lazy as hell) but before I finish, I just want to do a bit of a shout out to Neville and Luna. I feel like we of the readalong are very much in love with both Neville and Luna (as well we should be!) and so almost every week we go 'OMG NEVILLE DID THIS AND LOL LUNA I LOVE YOU!' and that kind of makes me forget that in the book? They're kind of like the least popular people ever. They're the only ones who still check their DA coins for more meetings because they don't really have anything else to do, and this just BREAKS MY HEART. But then, at the same time, this is a part of why we love them so much, because we appreciate the qualities in them that no one else does, right? And besides, real world popularity>popularity in a book, right?

That's all I have. Apart from, also, the blues. But I'll be ok. Now to find a copy of Beedle the Bard for next weeks post...

*I don't even think these are 'devices'. So, um, narrative things? And stuff?

"'Dumbledore's man through and through, aren't you Potter?'"

Ooooh, things are really heating up in the Half Blood Prince, huh? And by heating up, I obviously mean that nothing has REALLY happened, but so much has been set up, not just for the rest of this book, but for the last one too. This isn't something I've really noticed before, but this book is really ALL about the final book, isn't it? Piecing together Voldemort's story to lead up to the BIG VOLDY REVELATION, waiting for Malfoy to do... Something, and still trying to figure out if Snape is evil or not. It's all... totally intriguing and mysterious (I mean, less so now that I know what's going to happen, but still) and that's almost better than the BIG things happening all the time.

And. Is it just me, or does this book kind of strip everything down and kind of go back to the basics- awesome and hilarious things happening in lessons, Harry being suspicious of people he doesn't like (reaaally quick note in brackets about the shipping Harry and Draco thing- If Harry secretly loves Malfoy, then he also secretly loves Voldemort.

i.e. I believe that neither of these things are true.) and Snape being ridiculously suspicious again. I feel like all of this is like a reward for getting through the complexness of OotP, and a treat to keep in mind when bad things happen. Which, as we know, they do. Almost constantly. But at least we'll always remember Harry being cheeky in potions, and everyone conjuring birds and failing to apparate and things!  Ahhh, good times.

For me, I feel like the most interesting part of this section (possibly of this whole book) is the piecing together of Voldemort's history. It's interesting, not only because of the things it leads to, but just in itself- born out of a mixture of love and witchcraft, raised by people who were paid to care for him, but not ABOUT him, and given hugely powerful powers that mean he can overcome his beginnings and be something more. It would be SO easy to feel sorry for him (I definitely feel sorry for Merope, but that's another story) but I think that what JK does so cleverly, and actually really subtly, is contrasting Harry with Voldy.

Because just by alluding to the fact that they both have dead mothers, only one chose to die FOR her son, and the other chose to die IN SPITE OF her son, you start to think of the other similarities between them. Both were raised by people who didn't care much for them. Both were told they were wizards at a similar age. Both were (eventually) orphans. And there's so little difference to their origins, that it really comes down to the fact that Harry chooses to be good, and Voldy chose to be bad. But then, it's really not as simple as that, because what Voldy did necessarily affected what Harry chose to do (how could he choose the dark side when that killed his parents?), and actually, both of their personalities seemed to be set before they even found out about their magic-ness.

I... have kind of lost the thread of what I was saying here.

Ok, yes, ANYWAY- the point is that you COULD feel sorry for Voldy, but then you have to take into account that everything he did, he chose to do, when he so easily could have chosen the opposite path, like we've always seen Harry do. Murderous assholes do not deserve our (or Harry's!) sympathy. Or at least not very much of it, anyway.

I think it's time for me to stop rambling and just bullet point a few things. Then I'll leave you all alone with your thoughts.

• You know when Snape comments on Tonks's changed Patronus? If he KNOWS what I know, then he actually IS an asshole, especially considering what I ALSO know about him. That has actually quite upset me, Snape-wise!
• "'It's high time your grandmother learned to be proud of the grandson she's got, rather than the one she thinks she ought to have- particularly after what happened at the ministry.'"

I feel like this about Neville AND McGonagall right now.

• "'Yes' said Harry stiffly. 'Yes Sir.' 'There's no need to call me 'Sir', Professor'" Yes. I approve of this kind of smart-assedness. ALL THE TIME.
• I am EXHAUSTED by the Ron and Hermione tension. Someone please just get those two together already.
• "'My mother can't have been magic, or she wouldn't have died.'" This is both heartbreaking, and maybe the most important thing we can know about Voldy. Maybe.
• Is it wrong to be worried about Malfoy? Because he is acting the way a depressed person would be acting, withdrawing from his favourite activities and not talking to his friends, and... Yeah. If I didn't know what he was up to, I'd feel sadder for him. Stupid Malfoy.
• Harry asks Luna to Slughorn's party! I love this. LOVE. He genuinely could have taken anyone, but this boy is loyal to his friends. (LUNA!!)
• Percy is such a DOUCHE making his mother think he was coming home for Christmas when really he was using Harry to get ahead at work. Scrimgeour is also a douche for trying to make Harry do things for the Ministry when the Ministry has never done anything non-damaging for Harry. That was really a very douchey chapter (Fleur didn't even get a Christmas jumper!)
• I can't understand Harry AT ALL when he says he isn't bothered about apparating. UM... that's teleporting, Harry. That's going places in NO TIME and without any effort. But you 'prefer flying'? WHAT THE HELL?!

• The love potion bit is very amusing, and possibly even more so in the movie. DAMN, potions are hilarious, why did we never know this before? I blame Snape, frankly!

So. Stuff. I'm discovering more and more that I remember nothing important about this book, cause I don't know what the deal with the cursed necklace is, and I don't really know why Ron is like DYING at this precise moment in the book. But hey, I remember the end. Which is why I'm going to have... Troubles reading the rest of the book. Oh man.