Thursday, 15 May 2014

"'Why, I can't help smiling at people, and speaking prettily to them. I know I'm no *better* than the rest of the world, but I can't help it if I'm *pleasanter*.'"

It's Wednesday night and I'm tired and have a limited amount of time to write this, so let's make it snappy!
Not... That kind of snappy.
Question 1: Lady Audley has totally murdered George, right? At the very least she knows where he is, but she's murdered him, maybe? It was total genius to send that telegram to her dad to tell him to tell anyone who asks that George has gone back to Australia (how are you going to prove that didn't happen in the 19th century? It's not like George has stopped updating Victorian Facebook) and totally annoying that Robert being on the case makes her faint because FFS we don't just faint all the time! What is it with women in books?!
Question 2: Who is the narrator? I suspect this isn't even going to be a thing, and the narrator is just calling Lucy 'My Lady' out of respect, but wouldn't it be cool if this was being narrated by some servant or whatever, and at the end they're all like 'and it was I, the Butler, who discovered all the things!' 
This probably isn't going to be a thing.

Question 3: How excited am I that Robert is kind of turning out to be the hero of the piece? I can actually answer this one, it's very. Even though it means he has to do some work, I think it's sweet that Robert wants justice, or an answer, or something, for his one true love. I'm just going to gloss over that bit where he said he'd lock up his daughters til they were suitable for marriage and then basically sell them because UGH, no Robert.
Question 4: Can we somehow rescue Phoebe from her MURDERY CRAZY HUSBAND? I'm not sure that those two haven't passed out of the story forever, except actually Phoebe will probably be back because of her creepy twin-ness and the fact that she's been compared to a ghost already. FORESHADOWAMUNDO?

Question 5: "'You think her sensitive because she has soft little white hands, and big blue eyes with long lashes, and all manner of affected, fantastical ways, which you stupid men find fascinating.'" Is Alicia now my personal hero? Is this true for all pretty women all the time? Should we not judge people by their appearances but by other stuff instead? 
Question 6: "The lazy bent of his mind, which prevented him from thinking of half-a-dozen things at a time, and not thinking thoroughly of any one of them, as is the manner of your more energetic people, made him remarkably clear-sighted upon any point to which he ever gave his serious attention." Um... Am I Robert Audley? Because I sort of kind of might think like that a little bit, sometimes. Shit.

OK, I'm sure you'll all have many more interesting things to say about this week's chapters, and I shall be excited to read them all, but for now, I am out. Good day to you all, I say, and try not to marry your cousins or get hat feathers in your eyes.


  1. Luke scares the shit out of me, AND I AM NOT EVEN IN THE BOOK. Even more so than Lady Audley, because you do get the feeling you could whisper something creepy in her ear and she'd fall over. OH HOW TERRIFYING.

    Alicia is so down with this 'Lady Audley sucketh' thing (*snort* It's the first section all over again), I love her. She is basically a Mitford. Oh, and I also saw myself in Robert a tiny bit this week. The whole 'lazy until a big moment comes and then ALL THE DETERMINATION' thing. Onwards...

    1. Luke is scarier in a big man could kill you way, but Lady Audley is scarier in a calculating will see you dead if she sets her mind to it way. Like, I feel like you could outsmart Luke somehow, but with Lady A, I'm not so sure.


  2. Question 2: Ahahaha I didn't even think about it. And they fainted because of CORSETS. Had to remember to breathe in those things.

    I love Robert so much. So. Much.

    1. Ah, corsets. Of course! I also have a theory about period pain-no ibuprofen but that might just be me...

      I want to marry Robert but he's totally too gay for marriage. Except to a man. Like George. Who might be dead.

  3. Oh man, I would LOOOOOVE if the narrator was some servant. I mean, I don't think it is cos how could they know all the stuff that Rob is doing when he searches for George BUT STILL. Would be neat.

    I'm liking Alicia more and more. Not to the point where I'm like "YEAH! I hope you do end up with your cousin" because dammit, stop that. But still, Robert and Alicia are kicking ass. And Lady Audley totally murdered George.

    1. Omniscient narrator who is also a character? WHY NOT? (no, yeah, it's probably just a regular omniscient narrator. That 'my lady' stuff does throw me, though.)

      Robert and Alicia are definitely getting married. I'm sorry, this is just how this ends.

  4. I fainted ONCE in my entire life that wasn't due to health reasons. It was in a Land Law moot, which perhaps should have made me re-evaluate my choice of career, but there you go. I certainly don't faint whenever people (INCORRECTLY) mention circumstantial evidence, which really WOULD be a mark against Hanna The Lawyer.

    It would be interesting if the narrator was a servant, but I doubt it. Otherwise how could they know what both George and Lady Audley were doing? Also, part of it was in the second person which was odd.

    Yeah, the twin thing has to be relevant somehow. Or you'd think so, but then the baby shoe hasn't exactly been relevant. I have a suspicion MAB started releasing the earlier installments before she entirely knew where the book was going...

    Apparently I'm the only one who doesn't mind Lady L and wants to strange Alicia then!

    1. Hmmmm, you could be right about the installments thing. But if something isn't made of this twin thing, I'm going to be piiiiiissed.

      God, imagine if you did faint whenever anyone talked about circumstantial evidence? That would not be good. Although maybe you'd get so angry because they were being WRONG about it that you'd forget to breathe for a bit and then faint. Seems legit.

  5. Phoebe seems like she's born to die. She looks like a ghost and is marrying a guy she knows could commit a murder. She's got a death wish, that one.

    1. Pooooooor Phoebe. *shakes head sadly*

  6. Luke is so scary. If Lady Audley were a nice person, she'd have given Phoebe some money to get the hell out of dodge. Surely if anyone can understand the need for getting the hell out of dodge, it is Lady Audley.


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